look good versus feel good

I have to remind myself  of this fact daily: I feel amazing right now, but I also look objectively worse than 12 weeks ago. 

What changed?

12 weeks ago

- tired as fuck without copious caffeine.

- I trained full body 2 days a week. Everything to failure and beyond.

- goal was strength and size.

- off days were mace and stretch days. 

- Get some sun daily 

- I was damn near useless the day after lifting but soreness otherwise wasn't a thing.

- sex drive = not great

Today

- energy levels are amazing. Drinking less caffeine then I have in years.

- I train daily. With few exceptions (see: the occasional set of arms) nothing is to failure 

- goal is endurance.

- there are no off days.

- get some sun daily.

- low grade soreness every day, but it doesn't actually do anything.

- sex drive = constant. Not 20s levels but it exists

I gotta tell ya, my brain keeps trying to edge me back into looks good territory but in fighting it hard. I love the way I feel right now, and I'm just a few weeks in to this style of training. More to come in the future, but I need a reminder in print for the next 30min when I wonder if a 5/3/1 bench has a place in my life (narrator: it doesn't).